Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Tuesday Debate- Other People's Kids

Tuesday Debate - Other People's Kids

So yesterday afternoon I took my kids to the pool. It's a lovely pool, complete with the slide, play house and lazy river (my fav). My daughter and I were getting out of the lazy river and trying to manage the big inner tube in the midst of a bunch of other inner tubes and people entering the river. It was a mess ! (Seriously- we can put a man on the moon, but have yet to design underwear that stays put and a separate entrance and exit for the Lazy River? C'mon!) Anyway, another young girl who was wanting to get in put both of her hands on my daughter's tube  and pushed her backwards. I was standing right behind Z1 so she didn't go far. But before I could stop myself, I looked her right in the eye and very sternly said."There is NO need to push. (Insert slight head bob here). The words "excuse me" work in all fifty states in this great nation."  Her jaw dropped open and stunned she backed off and said,"Excuse me. . . " and we politely moved over and helped her get in the river.

Now here's the debate. . . when another child does something to your child, do you say something? Let it go? Ignore it and move on? Do you address her parents (which were no where to be seen)?  Was I completely out of line?

Let the comments begin!

Melissa

2 comments:

  1. I struggle with this more often than I want to admit. I typically handle "kid conflict" by stepping back and watching my kids defend themselves. However, if the conflict accelerates or involves any sort of physical contact, I'll step in and try to act as moderator.

    A few months ago, my six year old's "best friend" kept yanking on her backpack and not allowing her to walk three steps without being jerked (fairly forcefully) backwards. Meredith repeatedly told the girl to stop. When she didn't, I wedged myself between them and said, "Do you not understand STOP?! STOP means get your hands off of her backpack!" (I still feel guilty about raising my voice. However, with that said, the mom of "best friend" was sitting there and laughing as she watched the entire thing--"best friend" being a bully, and Meredith nearly in tears because she wasn't being allowed to walk. Ggggrrrrr...)

    I like to think everyone out there is doing their best to raise thoughtful, smart, and kind children. (Nothing but blue skies do I see...) However, if a thoughtful, smart, and kind child shifts focus and becomes a menace, I think it's our jobs as moms to set them on the right path.

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  2. LOVE THIS!!! YES (screaming it) I always say something to the child and if the parent is around, I say it loud enough that the parent hears it. I say it calmly and sternly and I use words that catch their attention, such as, "making fun of someone isn't going to help you feel better about yourself, so there is no need to act that way, be kind, it works better!" that's me talking to two tween boys riding bikes around our neighborhood after hearing my son and his friends warning each other each time a car was coming during our walk.. the tweens wanted to mock my son and company for yelling car each time...so I responded. The tweens stopped, stunned an adult would correct them and then rode on.

    Here's my beef with this: ITS THE PARENTS FAULT that these kids are SO incredibly rude -my son knows better and uses manners, which have been taught in the home first....

    okay,breath.....

    It isn't only in the lazy river or in the neighborhood, it's also in schools, churches, stores, amusements parks and the list could go on and on and on

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