Friday, July 30, 2010


Mexico 2010 013 Okay, faithful readers, Melissa and I are OFFICIALLY ON VACATION!!!  So you will not see any posts from us until Monday, August 8th, as we will be sunning ourselves on the beach with our families.  (Separate beaches, separate families!)

So let me just take a moment to thank you for reading our little blog here.  We love writing it for you.  If you have any suggestions on topics you’d like to see, let us know.  We’re open to anything (well, almost!).

Enjoy the next week or so.  I  know we will!


Thursday, July 29, 2010

Thursday Thoughts- Go Ahead! Ask!

So after Tuesday's post, I've been trying to listen more, talk less and not sweat the small stuff (read: constant whining when they don't get their way, as is such the case as I'm typing this post. But I'm not sweating it. I've sent The Hub in to deal with the mouths).

As the school year is approaching, I am more and more aware of my children's ages and how much I need to be involved in their lives- beyond making sure they are getting their homework completed and staying out of trouble. Recently, I found a lecture I went to on "Why Good Kids Go Bad"- a lecture given by a criminal lawyer (Thank you, Parents as Teachers for this presentation!)
It becomes more important every year to fight this next objective:


About what, you may ask? Know your child- their likes, dislikes, habits, hopes, dreams... they may be a insignificant as,"I hope I find a Disney Silly Band" to "I hope I become president some day." And while you can find out a lot about your kid, what about their friends? How well do you know their friends (and the friend's parents)? How much do your families have in common? What do the kids do when they are together? Especially at the friend's house?

You might hesitate to start poking around, thinking,"My kid's a good kid. He'll know what to do." You know, a lot of kids are really good kids that sometimes get curious. Or tempted. Or just really didn't realize what was happening before it was too late.

So ask questions. Don't be afraid. Their business is your business. That's why you're the parent, right? Don't hesitate to find out everything that is going on in their beautiful lives in a very loving, non-condemning way. It's as simple as ,"What did you do today?" or "Really? Tell me what you like about that..."

Go ahead. Ask. You'll be glad you did.

Yours, asking all kinds of questions!


Wednesday, July 28, 2010


TODAY IS THE DAY!!!  I’ve been waiting for this day for 10 years.  To be more precise, since the day I had my amnio and found out that both my babies were going to be boys, THIS is the day I’ve been looking forward to.  The day my husband takes my boys camping! 

You think I’m kidding, don’t you?  Seriously, when I learned that my twins were both boys, one of my first thoughts was, “How long before they camp overnight with Cub Scouts?  And how can I make sure Kent goes with them?”

So here it is; they leave today for 3 days and 2 nights of SILENCE in my household!  Unfortunately, due to some extenuating circumstances (you know, life happens) my 3 days won’t exactly be the solitude and blissdom that I envisioned, but I’ll still get in some quiet time and maybe even a massage.  What more can I ask for, really?

So here’s to peace and quiet, and a little bit of missing my boys, all of them!


Tuesday, July 27, 2010

One of THOSE Parents. . .

I always had ideas about parenting, growing p. What I would love to do for my kids, and what I would absolutely NEVER say or do. HA! That pretty much goes out the window in those moments of desperation. You would be surprised at the things that crop up and you think,"OUCH! I SWORE I would never say/do that!"

And then there are other things that we want to do/not do as parents. Something that I struggle with is busyness. Sometimes, I feel like my kids are asking me to play/interact with them all day long, and all I say is,"Not now, honey."

The question is, when does now ever get here?

I have to stop myself. It's harder to do this late in the summer, because, frankly, I'm ready to have a little space again. I'm ready for quieter days when constant conversation is not the norm. :-) But if I let myself get too busy for my kid- too busy to TALK, too busy to LISTEN, too busy to CARE, I'm letting them know they are on their own.

I'm not ready for them to be on their own. Independent is good, but if I want them to talk to me when they are in their teens, I have to listen and be available while they are in their tweens and elementary years.

Yes, I may have heard it all before. Yes, it may be the millionth time I've played that game. Yes, laughing over bodily function noises does not make my day. But one day, I may wish for that time back. I may want one more chance to listen and I might not get it.

So I'm taking that time today. The bed may stay unmade. My project may not get completed. We won't starve if I don't get EVERYTHING I need from the grocery. I can afford to read a little less in my book and listen to the story of my kids as it unfolds right in front of my eyes, while they are still willing to share.

Yours, making the most of every last minute of summer break,


Monday, July 26, 2010


Have you ever heard a parent yelling those words?  Or worse yet, been the one panicking because you couldn’t find your child?  Even if it was lost childonly for a few seconds, there is no worse feeling than thinking you lost your child in an overcrowded place, such as an amusement park.

We lost Eric once at Disney World, and I thought my heart would just jump right out of my chest it was beating so hard.  Luckily we were on an attraction that was an island, so I knew he couldn’t go too far on his own, but visions of him being abducted were playing havoc on my brain.  We found him about 15 minutes later, thank goodness, playing innocently by himself, unaware that we were panicking.  Those 15 minutes were unforgettable.

Here are some tips to help you keep track of your children, or find them quickly if they become separated:

  1. Make sure they know your real name.  Sounds silly, right?  But how many toddlers know that their mom’s name is Mary Smith and not just Mommy?
  2. Teach them your cell phone number, but always put it on them someplace.  Put it in their pocket, on a dog tag around their neck, or even written on their arm with a permanent marker.  If they are upset that they are lost, they might become confused and forget the number.  Write it down.
  3. Dress them in bright clothing so you can easily pick them out of a crowd.  I do this even when we just go to the park at home.
  4. Teach them who is safe to approach.  Security or employees aren’t always around, so I tell them to find another mommy.  Do what makes you feel comfortable.
  5. Carry their Child Identification Information with you.  In The Caregiver Organizer For My Child, there is a place to enter allcaregiver organizer cover child 300dpi their indentifying information, including fingerprints and a photo.  You should keep this with you, especially when on vacation.  Hopefully you’ll never, ever need it, but if you do, it’s ready to give to the authorities.
  6. Lastly, when you find your child, don’t be angry at them.  Make the reunion a happy time so they don’t feel like they did something wrong.  She’s already scared at this point, so don’t make it worse.  Later, when everyone calms down, talk about it, and discuss what could have been done differently.

Hopefully you’ll never go through what we experienced in Disney World with Eric, but if you do, please be more prepared than we were.  I know we will be if there’s a next time!


Saturday, July 24, 2010

What Do You Mean It's Not Friday???

It wasn't until about 8:00 in the car last night that I realized it was Friday, meaning I REALIZED I had not posted my Friday Fun! Ouch! I can see Karen tapping her foot at me already. Slap my forehead, where was my brain?!?!?

Still in Nashville. That's where it was. My body was on the road, somewhere between Paducah and Mt. Vernon, but my head was still in Nashville. Something strange happens when I'm there. My songwriting world completely takes over. Which is how should be, I suppose. It's probably a good thing that I live six hours away. Otherwise how would I ever focus on anything else? Or maybe, that in and of itself is the issue. Who knows. ?

But I do know that one of the best things ever is after being away for three days, having those small arms wrap around your waist and hearing a muffled,"Mommy! I missed you!" first thing in the morning. I think that trumps any number one hit, even in the country market.

It's a lot, setting up the sitters, leaving the meals, coming home to a mountain of laundry and having them ask first thing, so what are we going to do today when all I really want to do is have an extra three hours of sleep and then process everything that happened on my trip. But I wouldn't trade them for the world. Not even for a Grammy.

Yours, lucky to get to live more than one dream,


Thursday, July 22, 2010

Thursday Thoughts In Nashville

Melissa here, and I'm in Nashville once again. I'm doing exactly what Karen blogged about yesterday. I'm here because I'm following a dream.

I write. That's what I do. If I didn't, I think I would shrivel up and die. When i don't, I'm not easy to live with. When I'm writing, I'm in another place completely (mentally) just working it out. It haunts me. It gnaws at me until I've said it just perfectly. Sometimes it takes 30 minutes and sometimes I hold on to an idea for seven years. Sometimes an idea is for now, and sometimes it's for later. But I have to do it. Sometimes it's a song, other days it's an organizational book and still other times it is a long overdue letter of affection that someone close to me needs to hear.

On my drive down yesterday, I heard one of the first songs that really grabbed my attention with the way it was written and in when I listened to it the first time I realized,"Hey! I want to do that!" I needed to hear that song. This trip has had (and will continue to have) a lot of good moments, but there are always those moments where you say,"Why the HECK am I doing this?" And you wonder if it is all for naught.

Today, even though I had that moment, I choose to say it isn't. Today I choose to pursue my dreams. Today I choose to believe that even though the dream still looks far away, I can reach out and grab it by the tail and pull it back to me. Because without the pursuit of dreams, what else is there?

Yours, living the dream,


PS- A special thanks to the Hub and Aunt Bet for their part in making my dreams possible. Love you!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010


experience life mag I ran across an excellent article by Robin Sharma in Experience Life magazine (the magazine put out by Lifetime Fitness Clubs) and wanted to share it with you.  To see the article in its entirety, click here.  But I’ll summarize for you some powerful ways on how you can live an extraordinary life.

  1. Read books by people you respect and admire.  Some of their brilliance just might rub off on you.
  2. Put some skin in the game.  The more you fail, the more quickly you will succeed, so don’t be afraid of taking chances.
  3. Be happy.  Do what makes you happy.  (Sounds obvious, right?  But how many of us really do it?) Robin’s suggestion is to make a list of your top 10 passions, then schedule one per week over the next 10 weeks.  If you don’t schedule it, you’ll never do it.
  4. Listen twice as much as you speak.  You send a message to a person when you listen to them that you value what they have to say, yet so many of us either don’t listen, or don’t actively listen.  We’re usually already thinking about our replies before they are done talking.
  5. Make sure your schedule reflects your values.  You may say you value your family more than anything else, but what does your schedule say?  Robin writes, “Your schedule is the best barometer for what you truly value and believe to be important.”  So if that means you have to write in family time, then make sure you do it.
  6. Be enthusiastic.  Think of the people you enjoy being around.  Do they love life?  Are they curious?  Do they love to learn?  Strive to be like that, and you’ll find that you’ll handle whatever the day brings to you with a smile.
  7. Relax, and you’ll be more productive.  Working harder is not always the way to better ideas.  Sometimes when you chill out and have fun, you can find more creative solutions.  So be sure to take those vacations and get out of the office without your Blackberry sometimes!
  8. Take care of yourself.  You need to feel good yourself to be a good leader and be good at work, no matter what that work may be.  Take care of your body and your mind, enjoy your life, and you’ll be more enjoyable to others.

Robin Sharma is the CEO of Sharma Leadership International, a global training and coaching services firm. This article is excerpted from The Greatness Guide: Powerful Secrets for Getting to World Class. Copyright 2006 by Robin Sharma. Reprinted by arrangement with HarperBusiness, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers.

Monday, July 19, 2010


My kids have started asking me questions that are making me feel really stupid lately.  Yes, like “Why is the sky blue?”  My answer to that was “Seriously?  Are you really asking me that question?”  Okay, soquestions maybe that was my way of avoiding having to come up with a real answer, but don’t most kids ask things like that when they’re 3 or 4?  My kids are 9.

Here’s another one:  “Where do tape worms live?”  Answer:  “Um, in people’s bodies.”  “But where do they live before they get in your body?  And how do they get in there?”  Breathe, breathe…  “So what did you do at camp today, honey?”

And then there are the “What if…?” questions.  These are really fun because there are no real answers to them!  For example, “What if someone built a house that was a mile long and 9 stories high?”  “Well, they’d have a really, really big house.”  (I mean, how else would you answer this question?)  Or “What if that pole (one of those cell towers disguised as a flag pole) fell down?”  “I suppose we could hope that it wouldn’t fall on anyone and hurt people.”  “Oh, that would be so cool, Mom!”  Yes, of course, I just made that scenario even more awesome for them because it could possibly involve blood!

When I was a kid and I asked my parents a question they couldn’t encyclopedias answer, they told me to look it up in the encyclopedia (the real set of books).  Now, I have started telling my kids to Google it, or look it up on Wikipedia.  Same thing, and even more updated.  Either way, we tell them this to give our kids the impression that we want them to learn it on their own, but really, we just don’t want them to know how little we know, right?  Right?


Friday, July 16, 2010

Friday Fun- Things I'd Like To Say....

But usually don't. Why? Because who would I say them to? Well, dear readers, it's you! YAY! Aren't you so excited?!?!?!

Here are some things that have been running around in my head this week. (Yes, I know, lots of space up there... hahaha!)

1.) Dear Chase Visa/MC,

Although I admire your tenacity and persistence in sending me an application for your fine credit card no less than three times a week over the past 2 years, if I haven't applied for your credit card yet, guess what- I'm probably not going to. That being said, I've begun throwing your applications into a bag placed next to the fire place. You see, the thickness of your application is PERFECT for kindling to start a fire. Now that I have so many, no need to buy Firestarter Logs this year! Thanks a bunch!

2.) Dear St. John's Mercy Medical,

I'm still not over the fact that you wanted to charge me $1,250 more than Metro Imaging for the same. exact. tests and consultation. I just can't see coming back to you for that price, especially when you cannot even to give me a gown that looks good on me, let alone closes in the back so my business isn't seen by everyone. I mean, for that price, shouldn't the gown be made of silk? And to that end, shouldn't you be serving hors d'oervres and a really good wine?

3.) Dear LeapFrog Friend,

First, let me define the term Leapfrog. It's a term I use for persons who are all about you when they need you, but once their attention is garnered elsewhere, the LEAP over you and are long gone. I'm done with you. But then they mysteriously pop up again when whatever else took them away bores them. You've just worn me out one too many times. Besides, with people like Karen in my life, why would I need a Leapfrogger? And when you were leaping over my head, the view wasn't all that spectacular and certainly not very fragrant. Please do us a both a favor and keep hopping along. Thanks a bunch!

Oh, I feel so much better. And now, onto my birthday celebration this evening with the girls. Looking forward to a great pedicure this evening!

Yours, wiggling my toes,


Thursday, July 15, 2010

How. Many. More. Days??!

How Many more days? I've started counting, so we must be somewhere in July. At least it's not June. I believe we officially have about 31 days exactly at this moment (8:52) until the first day of school.

My husband and I were talking through some schedule stuff last night and he said pointedly," Why don't you just meet her for lunch instead of dinner?"

To which I promptly replied,"I don't move as freely as you during the day."

What I wanted to say was," Why of course, Dear. Why didn't I think of that? Because I'm certain that between her two/three children and our two children, all of whom happen to be different ages, we will have focused quality time for rapt discussion in which we not only solve the issue at hand, but eliminate war, hunger and design the perfect shoe."

Not that I'm feeling a little sassy or edgy these days, but I digress . . .

And as for my sitter list, clearly I need to add some more names. I tried no less than eight different sitters yesterday and EVERY ONE is out of town. Such is the month of July. It's not just me, either. My girlfriends are running into the same issues. It must be time to bring in a new crop of sitters.

I'm also trying to develop a list of things my kids can do while I am trying to work. The game cabinet has lost its luster, the Slip and Slide, well, we've gone through three of them in the last two weeks (to be fair, one was broken when we bought it), and the pool requires me actually being there with them.

Looks like it's time to go to Nashville if I want to get anything done!

Yours, loving my children, but looking forward to school starting,


Wednesday, July 14, 2010


My best friend from high school, Brenda, is in town this week.  Unfortunately, she’s here because her step-mother, who I am also verykaren and brenda close to, is critically ill, but nevertheless, it’s still great to see her.

We were having lunch in the hospital cafeteria with several other family members when one of us, I can’t even remember who, said one word (“bloodcurdling scream” – okay, 2 words), which sent us both into fits of laughter.  And I thought, “That, right there, is the difference between old and new friends.”  Don’t get me wrong, new friends are wonderful.  They share more of my current life with me than my old friends do actually.  They definitely know me (as I am today) better than the friends from long ago.

But who else can you look at out of the blue and say “pile cake” to and she’ll start laughing and know exactly what you’re talking about?  Only someone who has known you for 35 years!  She may not know everything going on in your marriage today, but she knew every intimate detail about every romance or crush you had in high school.  Seriously, EVERY detail!  And she may not be the first person you call anymore when you have a problem, but how many times did you cry on her shoulder with the latest tragedy that was sure to be the most devastating event of your life?

So even though we may be out of touch for months at a time, Brenda and I will always have a bond that can only be forged as best friends in high school can do.  Our hearts will always be “soul sisters” no matter how much time and distance has passed, and isn’t that the real test of friendship?

Hey Bren, remember Dee Dee and Beaver?

Karen (A.K.A. Kerny)

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Ode to Miss Kelley

Tomorrow will be a tragic day in the B House. Although we have already said our goodbyes, we know that Miss Kelley, our regular sitter for the last four years, will be moving. Sigh.

She was the type of sitter that Vanessa posted about yesterday. I trusted her with house keys and driving my kids around town. Her mom came by and checked on her regularly. She exchanged Christmas gifts with my kids. She always texted me while I was away at work to let me know when she had picked them up. She's the one who saved my Z2 using the Heimlich maneuver. She even cooked dinner AND CLEANED UP AFTER HERSELF.

Like I said, losing her is a tragedy. I knew this day would come. I've been dreading it for some time now. While I do have other sitters that I like, as Z2 would say,"They're not Miss Kelley. . . . "

So I'm beginning the entire process again- finding a sitter. I'm digging out my sitter interview questions. I'm digging out my rating charts and qualifications. I have three more years before I can leave Z1 home alone.

So here's to you, Miss Kelley. May you do well in college in the fall. And always know, you have a place at the B House should you ever need to get away.

Yours, with a heavy, heavy sigh today,


Monday, July 12, 2010


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5 Tips For Being An Awesome Babysitter

By Vanessa Van Petten, author and creator of, a parenting blog written by kids.  She also is the founder of the Radical Parenting Babysitter Certification course.

Babysitting can be an awesome way to make extra money or even as a full time career if you love working with kids and families.  Whether you are babysitting or you are a parent wanting to give your new babysitter some tips, here are some of our favorite pieces of advice for being an awesome babysitter:

1. Have a stock of babysitter games
You never know when you are going to be in a house with no TV, while it's raining outside and a shortage of snacks.  Always have a notebook full of games you can play anywhere.  This can be word games for older kids, coloring games for younger kids or get-to-know-you icebreakers for those awkward first moments.

2. Be prepared
Make sure you know the family's basic emergency numbers, the number for poison control and a back-up adult you can call.  You never know when you might need a little extra help and it is better to be safe than sorry!

3. Know how to make fun snacks and basic kid recipes
I cannot tell you how many times I went over to a family's house and the mom wanted me to whip up Mac and Cheese, pasta or rice and veggies.  Make sure to watch some videos on boiling pasta, cooking rice and heating up certain foods. Hungry kids mean irritable kids!

4. Consider getting a babysitter certification!
A babysitter certification is a course for babysitters. Ours is four parts and we cover hundreds of topics that babysitters deal with on the job and provide answers, activities and programs for them. (See full list of lessons below). In the course babysitters go through a workbook, textbook and complete homework lessons before taking the final exam.

Once certified, you can use our programs, recommendations and referrals to build their business. Many parents have also signed their babysitters up for the program as a refresher on ideas, safety tips and activities for their kids.

5. Practice
Offer to babysit neighbors or cousins for free until you get less nervous about being alone and feel like you can handle all kinds of situations.
We hope these tips have helped! Be sure to check out our
Babysitter certification course, we also offer a bunch of free tips!
Vanessa Van Petten
Author: "You're Grounded!"
Twitter: @vvanpetten
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Check out my next book: Parenting Is Flat

Friday, July 9, 2010

Friday Funny- Innate or Learned?

The other day I was recounting to a friend how quiet my son was when younger. He didn't really start talking in longer conversations until about age 4. About that time, my daughter was two. She went from two word phrases to lengthy monologues.

And the question still goes unanswered. . . born that way, or do they learn it?

Yours, wishing you a wonderful weekend,


Thursday, July 8, 2010

Thursday Thoughts- Bringing You Up to Date

Well, I did it. I went for that mamm and ultrasound. Karen went with me, God bless her. She sat in that waiting room while I had all those x-rays done.

Personally, I think there should be a law about x-ray technicians. I think it should be illegal for them to have cold hands. Seriously! think about it. . . It was quite uncomfortable to be having someone place my chest into a clamp. But to do it with cold hands? Yikes!

I am happy to report the okay and the good news. . .

The okay news: Yes they found something. It will have to be removed.

The good news: All of the doctors believe whole heartedly it will be tested and come back benign. Something called a fibroid adema? All I know is I will be happy to have. it. OUT.

I cannot tell you how important it is to get these tests done. If you are 35 or older, see your OB/GYN today and get it scheduled. It's not glamorous, fun or even adventurous, but I will certainly sleep a little better absolutely knowing for sure that all is as it should be.

Yours, wondering how does one lobby for a warm hands law?


Wednesday, July 7, 2010


FINALLY, I reached my weight loss goal! 



fireworks Can you tell I’m a little bit excited?  Well, I should be!  I’ve worked really hard over the past year and a half to lose this weight the right way, through healthy eating changes and exercise.  I don’t consider myself having been on a “diet.”  If that was the case, then the diet would be over and I would be going back to my old eating habits (and of course the weight would come right back on).  Hopefully, I’ve learned a lot since the beginning of 2009, lessons that will keep me at this weight for the rest of my life (ugh, that seems like such a long time). 

So what have been the most exciting results of losing this weight?  Well, besides the obvious of looking and feeling better about myself physically, there have been other, incredible benefits.  The first, most awesome one is how proud I am that I accomplished this goal.  I feel so empowered, which has really leaked into other areas of my life.  It has given me strength where perhaps I was lacking before.

The second one that is so amazing to me is that I have actually become a source of inspiration to others.  People at the gym and at Weight  Watchers have come up to me and told me that I have inspired them to keep working out or stay on the WW program.  I can’t begin to tell you how incredible that makes me feel.  And it helps me want to keep the weight off, not just for myself now, but because I don’t want to let anyone else down!  (Isn’t that funny how we do that?  But hey, if that helps me be accountable in keeping it off, I’ll use whatever works!)

Here you can see before and after pictures (and the sad thing is, the “before” picture is after I had lost about 10 pounds already!):karen beforekaren in swimsuit

So, am I a little nervous about keeping it off FOREVER?  Yep!  But I know I can do it if I just keep everything in perspective.  Will I indulge every so often?  Of course!  I do now!  That’s what keeps me sane and on track!  Am I happier now than I was 50 pounds ago?  YOU BETCHA!!!

(Skinny) Karen

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Tuesday Tidbit- Sitter Dilemma...

So I've hit that point in the summer where all of my sitters are leaving for vacation.


How will I ever make it through July?

That's where friends come in. I've been fortunate enough to develop a network of friends that don't mind trading off from time to time. And they have kids the same exact age as mine, so it works out beautifully. Want to develop this? Here's a couple things I always try to follow. . .

1.) Pick friends with similar values/guidelines.
What does that mean? If low media time and low sugar intake are important to you, then try to find friends who think similarly. It makes it easier all the way around if we're all on the same page with the same expectations.

2.) Don't wear out your welcome.
Try not to let your kids be over there too long. If it's an emergency, that's one thing, but if it's just running to the store or getting a sanity break, try to keep it to no more than two hours if possible.

3.) Always give more than you get.
For lack of a better analogy, I like to try to store up credits. I make myself available so that when I'm in a pinch, hopefully they'll be there for me, too. Sometimes it doesn't always work out, but more often than not, my friends have pulled through for me when the going got tough.

Yes, I agree that it DOES take a village to raise a child. I'm just a fan of picking the people in my village. :-)

Yours, grateful for friends,


Monday, July 5, 2010

Babysitter Dilemma: The Kids Like Her Too???

 radical parenting banner small

We are thrilled that RadicalParenting.Com is featuring this article from us on their website today.  This is an awesome site, so please take a few minutes to visit them, browse around a bit and read Melissa’s article!

You know what you want in a sitter: on time, dependable, reasonable
rates, can take care of the kids without calling you fifty times. But
what about the kids? What do they want?

Right away, you’re thinking, ”They want someone who will let them
get away with everything!” True, most kids would love that. But
allowing the kids to have anything they want can be a high price to
pay just for a night out. Or worse yet, what if this is the sitter you use
on a daily or weekly basis?

So how do you find the middle ground?

For the rest of this article, CLICK HERE!

Friday, July 2, 2010

Friday Funny- RATS! It's THAT Time Again.

In honor of my yearly stick-fest, here it is, the story of what happens when I have to have a blood test that requires fasting. Let's hope this year has a much better outcome...

(From 2007)

So I went to have some blood work done on Friday. Nothing serious, just my yearly check up. I'm not much on needles. They tend to make me a little anxious. (UNDERSTATEMENT). Usually, the tech uses those baby butterfly needles and I'm okay. I get through it. I'm not sure what was going on with me on Friday, but I'm sitting in the chair and I'm and she's getting ready to stick me and I start to have a mini panic attack. They've happened a time or two, so I know when I'm really having one. But why over something I know is coming up at least once a year? I even coordinate my doctors so we only have to do this once a year so I don't panic. So I let out a big breath and I said,"You know, this is just silly. It's one stick and you'll be able to get the blood you need. I mean, honestly. You do this all day log and you've been doing it for years and I'm sure you're very good at it, right Sue?"

Sue, the phlebotomist (sp?) looks at me nodding and smiling that little reassuring smile and so I throw out my arms and say,"Aww, just stick me and get it over with."

She sticks me and I'm trying to make small talk while she'd collecting my blood. But the needle is vibrating. Yes. Actually vibrating.I have never felt that before. So I'm having a very hard time trying to go to my little happy place that gets me through being poked with a needle because it feels like I a sitting on a piece of machinery. Truly, my entire body was vibrating. Did Sue happen to hit my vein in some special cosmic area that holds everything together and my body is letting her know it did not appreciate it? I dunno. She had to take more blood than usual, so it seems to be taking forever. Finally she's done. It's about ten AM by now, and I'm really feeling it because I had to fast and I'm one of those people that has to eat a lot of protein and fiber like, every four hours or it just gets ugly. So I look at her and say, " You know, I'm not feeling too good. There's a granola bar in my purse. Could you hand it to me?"

She grabs my purse and says,"Are you okay? Why don't I get you a Sprite."

"Sure," I reply. "That would be nice. I'll be fine."

So I close my eyes to get focused. Mind you, I'm sitting in a chair with a little lap bar holding me in. I'm giving myself a stern talking to . . . "Now Melissa, just get it together. This is not the place to throw up. Your sugar is just low, eat the granola and pull up, sister!"

So I open my eyes and I'm looking at four sets of Birkenstocks and Crocs with a thickly Indian-accented voice yelling,"Can you hear me?! Can you hear me?! Do you have a medical condition?!?!?!?"


Clearly this lady is in a panic and I certainly don't have a clue as to why OR WHO THE HECK SHE IS AND WHY IS SHE YELLING AT ME?

Apparently somewhere between the needle being pulled out and my blood sugar dropping, all of my adrenaline kicked in and out I went. I've always wondered what people thought when they were driving their car and all of a sudden (insert accident) they come to in a hospital with a bunch of monitors and strange faces. Talk about twilight zone.

I can't tell you how embarrassed I was. Passing out over a blood test. Sheesh. What's next, people? I can give birth and raise kids, but a blood test puts me incoherently on the floor.

For sure, next time when they ask me if I want to lay down, I'm taking them up on it. I don't care how wimpy it makes me look!

Yours, thinking those blood test better tell them something after all of that!


Thursday, July 1, 2010

Thursday Thoughts- Today is the Day. . .

Well, dear readers, today I go to have my mammogram and ultrasound. . . . deep breath. . . in. . . out. . . Clearly I'm not relishing the thought of it. I AM relishing the thought of saving over $1,250 dollars! But the whole squishing of my chest, mmmm, not so much.

I will say this, though... through the whole messiness of this, it is amazing to see how women protect each other. I've had no less than five girlfriends call me to make sure that I made the appointment and am going. I've had girlfriends offer to go with me, and one even to take care of it if I couldn't. Wow. I'm quite overwhelmed. Women get other women, especially when it comes to something like this.

I have to say, when Karen and I first started this business, I thought we got along pretty well. I thought we might even get to be pretty good friends. I never looked down the road far enough to see that she would be the one going into that room with me, standing there while they read the mamm and ultrasound. THAT's a good friend. (Especially because I know how much she absolutely hates anything that remotely has to do with a hospital or serious concern). If we never sell another book, lose the business and never become famous authors, well, I've gained something far more precious. It's hard to find a good business partner, let alone an even better friend. Yep. I'll be holding on to her. :-)

I'll let you know how it turns out later today. I'm praying for good things.

Yours, grateful for true friends,