BRACES ARE GOING TO BREAK ME!

Forget college, braces are going to put me in the poorhouse! Having twins is NOT all it’s cracked up to be when it comes to expenses. Apparently they are both ready for braces. Now. Have you priced them lately? I’m told that we’re “lucky” because they should only need them for around 15 months each, so we’re getting a bit of a discount. But we’re still looking at OVER $10,000 for the two of them. I may be dating myself here, but my braces cost $1600. (And yes, I’m sure, because my father told me this many, many times!)

Oh, but I’m in luck. If I pay all at once, I get a 5% discount. Or if I pay by credit card, I get a 2.5% discount. (Which would be really stupid because I obviously pay more that 2.5% finance charge on my credit card, but whatever. I’m sure somebody will fall for that one.)

You know, having an overbite isn’t the worst thing in the world, is it? Fine, you know I’ll get my boys braces, but the cost is just ridiculous.

At least braces are “cooler” now than they were in my day. I guess that’s why they cost so much more, right?

Karen

Separate Birthday Parties?

I suppose I should count myself lucky. For 10 years we’ve been able to combine the boys’ birthday parties into one big one. You know, being twins and all, it just made sense. But this year, our luck ran out. They wanted two different parties this time. One wanted a winter tubing party at our local (fake) snow “mountain” while the other wanted a paint ball party when it gets warmer. And it’s not like we couldn’t invite one to the other’s party, right? So really, they’re each getting 2 parties. Hardly seems fair! (Really, I think they planned this out, but I’m keeping that opinion to myself!)

So here’s what we’re doing this year: we’re letting them each invite 2 friends to each party. Yes, they are both getting 2 parties, but they’re like mini parties! Oh, and goody bags? At 11 years old, I’m DONE with those! Actually, I was done with those last year. I figure I’m spending enough on the parties, they can give ME a goody bag!

Oh, and really? I’m pretty much done with parties, too! I have a feeling that they’re getting ready to outgrow them. I know I have!

Karen

THE TWINS ARE SEPARATING!

It’s time. We knew this day would come. We naively thought it would be later. But it’s here. At the age of 10. The twins have decided they want separate rooms. **Sigh** We have a four bedroom home and have really enjoyed spreading ourselves out! We have the master bedroom, the twins’ room, the office, and the sewing (HE sews, not me)/eBay/junk room.

Now what?

I’ll tell you what. Now we have to clean up the junk and sell all the eBay crap that I’ve been putting off selling for years so we can consolidate two rooms into one. Ugh!

Oh yeah, wait, this is about them, not me. Okay, refocus here. So the boys are 10 years old and have decided they need their own space. Why do boys need their own space? I mean, if they were girls I would understand. Or if they were boys hitting puberty, I would get it (yuk!). But 10 year old boys? I guess they just need time apart. Separating everything is going to be tough, though. They share everything: clothes, books, toys, you-name-it. (Even down to their undies!) But this is important to them, so we’ll figure it all out.

This is one of those “growing up” events, isn’t it? Damn, I hate those!

Karen

THE SOUNDS OF SILENCE…FINALLY!

TODAY IS THE DAY!!!  I’ve been waiting for this day for 10 years.  To be more precise, since the day I had my amnio and found out that both my babies were going to be boys, THIS is the day I’ve been looking forward to.  The day my husband takes my boys camping! 

You think I’m kidding, don’t you?  Seriously, when I learned that my twins were both boys, one of my first thoughts was, “How long before they camp overnight with Cub Scouts?  And how can I make sure Kent goes with them?”

So here it is; they leave today for 3 days and 2 nights of SILENCE in my household!  Unfortunately, due to some extenuating circumstances (you know, life happens) my 3 days won’t exactly be the solitude and blissdom that I envisioned, but I’ll still get in some quiet time and maybe even a massage.  What more can I ask for, really?

So here’s to peace and quiet, and a little bit of missing my boys, all of them!

Karen

SHARING YOUR HOME WITH NANNY

When my husband and I found out we were going to have twins, one of the first decisions we made, after the decision that NO, we would NEVER BUY A MINI-VAN UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE (and yes, we’ve stuck to that!) was that we would hire a nanny instead of use day care. That turned out to be one of the BEST decisions EVER! (Probably even better than that mini-van decision, although that could be a toss-up!)

But before you hire a nanny, you must be prepared for many adjustments. It’s not easy having another woman in your household. Not for you or your husband. For him, it’s like having two wives sometimes, and not in the good way! For you, you’re sharing almost everything. And sometimes that’s good, because you’re able to share a lot of the responsibilities and delegate a lot of them to her. But you have to remember that she is basically in charge of the house and the kids from eight to five or so while you are gone.

I know, you’re thinking, “No way, Karen, it’s MY house and they’re MY kids and I’M the boss whether I’m there or not.” And in theory, you’re correct. But the reality is, you ain’t there and you ain’t the one making the decisions. Yes, you set the guidelines on how to run the household and what the children eat, drink, play with, etc. (And of course it’s all filled out in The Caregiver Organizer that you leave for her.) But she’s the one handling the minute by minute details that come up, day in and day out.

The bottom line is, you must be prepared to let go. You cannot maintain the control that you’re used to having when you have a nanny. It will just end up stressing you out, plus putting huge amounts of stress on your nanny, which will not be a good situation for your kids. If you try to micro-manage a nanny, she will end up leaving you. She needs to have a certain amount of independence in order to do her job effectively. That does NOT mean to let her do what she wants, of course. She is still your employee, taking care of YOUR KIDS, and that always gives you the right, and the duty, to keep your eye on her. But that’s another post for another day!

So just look at it this way… you now have a wife! Hmmm, interesting!

Karen

BUSINESS PARTNERS, YET SO DIFFERENT!

Melissa and I make great business partners, probably due to the fact that we are SO DIFFERENT! In many ways we are extremely similar, which is what drew us to each other, such as our core values in how we raise our children and run our business. But sometimes our differences are SO extreme, even we have to laugh and shake our heads!

For example, Melissa is a very spiritual person and I am, well… not. In any shape or form! She’s also a very emotional person. Let’s just say it takes a REALLY sappy commercial (remember those old AT&T commercials?) to bring a tear to my eye! She can just be talking about her day and BOOM! come the tears. (It’s so dang cute!)

But the other day as we were talking about our boys turning 9 (if you haven’t figured it out by now, their birthdays are only 2 days apart), our differences once again really came to light. Yes, I admit I was a bit wistful, but of course, Melissa had the water works turned on! The funniest thing was when we compared our first thoughts from when we both found out for the first time we were having boys.

Melissa didn’t find out until she actually gave birth to her beautiful baby boy. Having been a first grade teacher previously, her first thoughts were that she couldn’t wait until he was in first grade. She had memories of that time when little 6 year old boys would raise their hand and when she’d call on them, they’d say, “I love you Miss Whatever-her-name-was-then!” She longed to see that sweet, innocent time in his life.

I knew WAY ahead of time that I was having boys. Not only am I way too impatient, but with twins on the way, I needed to have my ducks in a row as much as I could. So when I found out that I was having 2 boys, my first thought, and I swear this is the truth (just ask my sister!) was “How many years until they are in Cub Scouts and have their first campout with their father so I can have the entire house to myself?”

I kid you not! (Oh, and by the way, it took 7 1/2 years!)

Karen

WHERE DID THE YEARS GO?

Somebody pinch me. Can it really be 9 years already? My babies are turning 9 today? How did this happen? I know it sounds so cliché, but I swear it only seems like yesterday that I was as big as a house (or two), yelling at my OB, “You said that if I made it to 37 weeks you would schedule the C-Section. It’s 36 weeks, so CALL THE HOSPITAL NOW AND SCHEDULE IT. NOW. WHILE I’M HERE AND LISTENING. NOW!!!” Maybe I shouldn’t have pushed that issue so hard. Hmmm, no, I’m pretty sure they would have come out by now!

So let’s look back to that fateful fabulous day. 9 years ago today when it was finally time to give birth (or in my world, get ripped open) to two beautiful baby boys. In the movies, the husband is holding the woman’s hand and stroking her hair and whispering to her what a great job she’s doing. (Yes, even when she’s having a C-Section, she’s still doing a great job.) Now, let’s compare that to MY reality that day. Yes, DH was holding my hand, but that’s pretty much all I got. Unless you call the play-by-play announcing a good substitute for whispering sweeties in my ear which, by the way, I do not. Here’s what I heard: “Okay, they are slicing open your uterus now. This is SO COOL!”

ARE YOU KIDDING ME????

SHUT. UP.

Pretty much, after that, he kept his comments to himself, but he was still standing up and looking over the little drape which (thank you) kept me from seeing everything. The only other things I heard were “Here’s baby number 1” and “Here’s baby number 2” and “They’re perfect” and that’s all I needed to hear!

So 9 years later, they’re still my babies. And although they may not always be perfect, they’re perfectly wonderful to me!

Karen

Tune-In Tuesday Debate

We are very curious about how other parents feel about a variety of topics, so we have begun our "Tune-In Tuesday Debate." Every Tuesday, we will pose a question to you and ask for your comments. Some might be silly, and some might be controversial. We'll try to keep politics and religion out of it!

Our first Tuesday Debate centers around parents, especially moms, who have multiples. When I was pregnant with my twins, you would not believe the questions I got, ranging from the direct ("Oh, twins, did you go through infertility treatments?") to the more indirect ("So, do twins run in your family?") Either way, I found it to be an invasion of my privacy and basically, none of their business!

So if you have twins, how do you feel about the questions you got? And by all means, share the funny ones with us! If you don't have twins, what do you feel is appropriate to ask an expecting mother? And why?

Who knows, maybe I'm looking at this all wrong. What do you think?

Karen