Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Glam and Sexy? Uhm, NO. It's not.

Okay, maybe I'm a little cranky today... but...

I was in the store this morning, doing my monthly household run. You see, I abhor having to stop at Walmart, not because of Walmart itself, but the shopping trip in and of itself almost always becomes a source of frustration for me. (That's another post entirely...) So here I am in the household cleaning section, making my way to pet care (Good news! Romeo and Juliet, our fish, have made it an entire year! UN. BE. LIEVABLE!) and as I'm passing the endcap, I notice this display for Glam Gloves.

Glam Gloves- these are heavy duty rubber gloves that have an extension of pretty and fashionable material that will reach all the way up to your elbows. Yes, they were pretty, but honestly, I was a little incensed by them.

Don't get me wrong. I love beauty in any form. I'm the girl that watches football precisely for the moment of kick-off. All of those players, charging the ball in a straight line, running all-out, charging in pursuit of a victory.. well, there's something beautiful in that moment. I love it as much as I love the clean lines of a classic made handbag or a vintage gown. I can find beauty most any place.

However, anything that requires the use of heavy duty rubber gloves will probably, if not most definitely, NOT make me feel beautiful. Or glamorous. Or sexy.

I can see how these came about. A group of five people in a marketing room, looking at stats on the sale of cleaning items. "How can we market these to the women of today? I know! We need to make them feel glamorous! BAM! Glam Gloves!"

Seriously? Dear Marketing Executives, allow me to make myself perfectly clear. No matter what color you make them, or how frilly or pretty they are, these gloves will not make me feel glamorous as I scrub dried egg off the frying pan. They will not make me feel beautiful while I am cleaning the fish tank. And they will certainly NOT make me feel glamorous, beautiful OR sexy as I wipe urine off the toilet bowl or clean up puke at 3AM. While I appreciate your attempt to make me feel wonderful, your ploy to make cleaning gloves look "glamorous" and make me want to buy them, failed miserably. I'm over the whole "inordertosellsomethingwemustmakeitsexyandglamorous" advertising ploy. I'm not stupid. Please don't treat me as such. It didn't work with laundry detergent, floor cleaner or any other functional household item. If you want to sell your product, help me understand why it will make the job faster, easier or cleaner. And if they happen to be pretty, it will be a bonus (which is why I bought the other gloves... they were functional, sturdy AND pretty, but didn't charge me another three dollars to be so).

Yours, wishing that this diatribe would actually REACH the marketing executives, knowing it won't, but still feeling better for having vented,


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