Good Morning Faithful Friday Funny Readers!
Universal Truths
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die. (Absolutely, unequivocally. I wonder if we could somehow start a service that does that from a remote location? Hmmmmm...)
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.(doh!)
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger. (sigh)
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font. (TRULY. How can we do this?)
5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (I gave up a while ago. Now I just kinda push it together and then push it into the linen closet. Better yet, I just wash it and put the same one back on the bed so I don't have to fold it. There you go. It's a non-issue).
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty
sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died. (I mean, really! I could tell you how a prof of mine died, and it was SO much more interesting than what the paper printed!)
10. Bad decisions make good stories. (hee-hee)
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I
don't want to have to restart my collection...again. (Seriously!)
16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call. (YUP, and I don't feel one bit guilty about it either!)
18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well. (I mean, c'mon! I gotta find the ice cream!)
19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite (or wine or Margaritas) than Kay Jewelry.
20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Speed Trap" and “Avoid Bad Neighborhood” routing options. (Like the speed trap at the Kentucky/Illinois border in Johnson County, Illinois. THAT would have been helpful a few weeks ago. . . )
21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I saw it the first time. ( I can't believe my mother let me watch "Grease" when I was ten. WHAT was she thinking? I'm still traumatized. And NO! It was NOT the edited version! Good thing I was clueless. . . )
Yours, wishing you a fabulous (and speed trap free) Friday,
Melissa
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