Friday Funny- Complete Randomness

It's Friday! I'm so close to the break in the end of semester/session tension I can feel it. I can't see it yet, but I know it's just around the corner. It's that time of the school year season where everything just crunches together, so I get a little tweaked during these last few weeks. I would love to be one of those completely unflappable, gracious under any circumstance people, but let's just agree it's a Personal Safety Day in the B House. 


It's a bit random around here, with everyone's activities coming to the year end, so today I'll celebrate that randomness with completely unconnected thoughts-as if to imply all my other thoughts are somehow woven together in a cohesive manner. Sheesh. I'm crackin' myself up already.


THE Talk continues... Z1 actually said the "V" word the other day. It was just strange hearing that word come out of my 11 yr old's mouth. We've transitioned to using the real and appropriate body part names, which is a good thing, a growing thing. Then he asked me if it was The Magic Lamp. HUH? I'm still trying to figure that one out. 


I misspelled the name Beethoven this week. I thought I was going to have to go lie down. When my sister found out she said, dryly,"I thought I felt the universe wobble today."


Hhmph. Clearly she does not sympathize with what that mishap did to my psyche. 


It's been raining a lot here in The Lou. On Tuesday, it took me an hour and a half- NO LIE- to get my hair contained. I washed it with a salon shampoo and it made my hair so full. Scary to small children full. I looked like this character but only blonde:

 I ended up pulling back into a huge bun on the back of my head. It was the only way to make it safely through the day.


Yours, looking forward to the break in the clouds!


Melissa

Random Thoughts of Friday Fun

I have to say, it's Friday and I'm feeling random.  That's a dangerous place for me to be, because everything turns funny. I lack focus completely and laugh at everything. 


Like laughing at my husband who is on a sales call with a client and he says,"Let's look at the "Tonto Knife". "  Now, there actually is a style of knife called Tonto. But of course, I didn't know that. I burst our laughing because, in my mind, Tonto from The Lone Ranger pops into my head saying "How."


Hey- remember on Monday when I was loving that second cup of coffee? That night.... I dreamed I was a Ninja Spider Monkey. I. KNOW- Coolest. Dream. Ever. 


EVER!


Let me suffice to say, I was kicking butt and taking names in my dream complete with the spiffy tail of a spider monkey. No one could stop me!


And then this afternoon I tried to stand up from the sofa. I had my laptop and my toes got caught up in the chord and I had to catch my self from doing a face plant. He's been teasing me about it all afternoon.


I guess that's what I get for giggling at him at the wrong times. I'll let your imagination run with that one.


Yours, pledging to remain random for the rest of the day,


Melissa

Thursday Thoughts- Random Summer Wonderings

It's Thursday. By the time I get here, I feel pretty random and loose ended. I try to keep it together, but well, at this point in the week, my skin is about the only things holding me together!

-It's been an eventful week. I was supposed to be in Nashville and it got rescheduled. :-(

-We've been reading a lot in my house. The kids have been working toward the second prize in the reading club at the library, which is a beach ball bigger than they are. It came into the house today. I wonder how long it will last. :-)

- Yesterday I went to the pool and forgot to use sunscreen on my back. Not good when you are as white as porcelain. It did, however, seem to have cleared up the sun rash on my back, while the front of me, where I used the sunscreen- still full of rash. What's the deal???

-My kids are awfully quiet at the moment. That's usually not a good sign. (So full of positive thinking, right?)

Yeah, can't focus on a darn thing today, and I have WAY too much to get done. Yikes! ANy suggestions?

Yours, awaiting your brilliant insight beyond, "Have a cup of coffee!"

Melissa

Thursday Thoughts- I'm Random

Yes, I forgot to blog on Tuesday. I'm so sorry. I blame it on the drugs. :-)

I've been sick for the last week- no voice for four days. Seriously- all I could do was whisper. My kids loved it. They thought they had complete reign of the joint. I put a stop to that immediately. Amazing what can happen when you take the media fix away from children. Snaps their bottoms in line pretty quickly.

I'm thankful for my doc, who called in the script without making me drive all the way into the city while I felt like poo. The trade-off is, of course, I have to come in for my yearly check-up next month, but at least he doesn't make me do both. I can live with that.

We are so close to the first complete rough draft of The Caregiver Organizer for my aging parent. In a couple of weeks, we'll be ready to give it to close associates who will go through it and tell us what they think. That's always a little nerve racking. After all, who wants to hear that their baby is ugly, right?

And for now, I have two more weeks of the kids being in school, while my school gig is finished for the summer. Oh how I treasure May. Love, love, love the month of May!

Yep, completely stream of consciousness today. But hey, at least I'm conscious. Which beats the last five days of zombiedom. I'll take it!

Yours, now getting ready to play catch-up,

Melissa

Friday Funny- Things that make you go,"Yeah! That's right!"

Good Morning Faithful Friday Funny Readers!

In the interest on not being a self-centered, whiny, ranting person this morning, I've decided to postpone my blog (Rant) about paper trails and people who think it's their duty to tell you how to run things. . . I'll get to that on Tuesday. Because today, it's FRIIIIIIIIIIDAAAAAAAAAYYYYY (yes, that is the note of happiness) and I just want to let loose.

So Karen sent me this e-mail that I thought was so funny in the mmmhmmmIknowexactlywhatyou'retalkingabout kind of way, and I've decided to repost it here. (And no, Karen, that does NOT count as a blog post for you. Love you!)

Universal Truths

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear

your computer history if you die. (Absolutely, unequivocally. I wonder if we could somehow start a service that does that from a remote location? Hmmmmm...)

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you

realize you're wrong.(doh!)

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was

younger. (sigh)

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font. (TRULY. How can we do this?)

5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (I gave up a while ago. Now I just kinda push it together and then push it into the linen closet. Better yet, I just wash it and put the same one back on the bed so I don't have to fold it. There you go. It's a non-issue).

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty

sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the

person died. (I mean, really! I could tell you how a prof of mine died, and it was SO much more interesting than what the paper printed!)

10. Bad decisions make good stories. (hee-hee)

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I

don't want to have to restart my collection...again. (Seriously!)

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not

seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to

answer when they call. (YUP, and I don't feel one bit guilty about it either!)

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well. (I mean, c'mon! I gotta find the ice cream!)

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or

Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite (or wine or Margaritas) than Kay Jewelry.

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Speed Trap" and “Avoid Bad Neighborhood” routing options. (Like the speed trap at the Kentucky/Illinois border in Johnson County, Illinois. THAT would have been helpful a few weeks ago. . . )

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and

suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I saw it the first time. ( I can't believe my mother let me watch "Grease" when I was ten. WHAT was she thinking? I'm still traumatized. And NO! It was NOT the edited version! Good thing I was clueless. . . )

Yours, wishing you a fabulous (and speed trap free) Friday,

Melissa