Monday, March 11, 2013

Monday Madness-Because It's Monday

Do you have an idea how much I enjoyed Karen's last post? I'm finally getting some respect around here. ;) 

It IS hard to be a working woman with a husband and kids. In my case, I have two part time jobs which equal to more than one full time job. And I'm married. With two children. Sometimes I'm caught up on laundry. Most often I'm not. Grocery shopping kills me. To be perfectly honest, after a long day of working with people, the last thing I want is to go to the store and be around more people. Lately, I've found myself just wanting to come home (my sweet, sweet haven) and be in complete quiet. Well, with the occasional guilty pleasure of Real Housewives or Shahs of Sunset. Talk about perspective! I mean, seriously, have you ever watched them? Farthest thing from reality, ever. But I digress...

But Vanderpump Rules? Wow. Just, wow. The victimization and drama. And the way the others will chase after one particular person. What kind of power does one person have over the rest of the other people? How do people do that? 

Sometimes I wish I knew. But then again, I really don't. I'm just not built that way. And I'm okay with that. 

Yours, toddling off to bed now,

Melissa

Friday, March 5, 2010

Friday Funny-Now THIS I Would PAY To See!


Sent to me, from my comedic friend Tara. . . .

It would be too good to be true, don't you think?

THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks. Each kid will play two sports and take either music or dance classes.


There is no fast food.


Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework,complete science projects, cook, do laundry,and pay a list of 'pretend' bills

with not enough money. In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week.


Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time--no emailing. Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment.He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Urgent Care.He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.


Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside, and keeping it presentable at all times.The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done.


The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn themselves with jewelry,

wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished, and eyebrows groomed. During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure abdominal cramps, back aches, head aches,but never once complain or slow down

from other duties.They will need to read a book to the kids each night and in the morning, feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hairby 7:00 am.


A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight,shoe size, clothes size, doctor's name, the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear,and what they want to be when they grow up.


The kids vote them off the island based on performance.

The last man wins only if...


he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice.(BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!)


If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over

again for the next 18-25 years, eventually earning the right to be called Mother!


After you get done laughing,send our link to as many mothers and fathers (who are the primary caregiver or REALLY good natured) as you think will get a kick out of it and as many men as you think can handle it.



Hope you have a wonderful weekend!


Melissa

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Tuesday Debate- This Just P#!@%s Me OFF!

Okay, this just flat out pisses me off. Seriously, it makes me want to vomit.

Octomom just inked a Reality TV Deal. Somebody tell me she wasn't in it for the money. And I've got a bridge, or two, or eight, to sell you. Honestly. I could be wrong, but it certainly seems as if all of these kids were conceived and birthed for the sole purpose of satisfying this chick's need for attention and fame.  

Excuse me while I hang my head in the porcelain bowl. I'm thinking right now that Family Services should consider stepping in. Got an opinion? Let's chat.

Yours, 

Melissa