Friday Fun- I Have Seriously Thought About These...

It's Friiiiiiiday. It's been a very long three weeks at the B house. First there was the week with three snow days. Not bad in and of itself, until that week was followed by a week with Z1 home for another three days with a tummy virus. He went back on Friday, alas, to a half day. This week, we had President's Day off, and Z1 has been home ALL. WEEK. with the flu. The real, bonafide, doctor tested and confirmed flu. Temp of 105.5. And on his birthday, too. The child looked like a train wreck.

All of this to say, I'm a little tweaky today. Tweaky as in ready to get in the car and lay down some serious rubber in the driveway. Momma need a day (or 8) off. So let's laugh a little, shall we? My girlfriend sent me this email, and I feel it is my humor-filled duty to pass it along. It's Friday, let's laugh!

Questions That Haunt Me:

Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word "lisp"?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE........

The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

Yours, awaiting all your answers to my questions,

Melissa